Are You a F*cking Idiot or Just a Business Owner?
Surviving Anonymous 1-Star Reviews - Business Owner Scary Stories
Hey there, Erin here! This week on scary entrepreneurial October stories, is all about the anonymous jump scare social media review of how you suck as a business owner. We all have this story, one random person who feels compelled to make your life a living hell by telling you that you are an absolute f*cking idiot owner.
There’s a little cafe within walking distance from our house. It’s locally owned and operated, and they have a really unique story. Originally, they started as a landscaping company and grew into different businesses (restaurants, a farm, quick bites, and a retail store) all based on the same unique purpose.
None of that sounds scary at all, because it isn’t. They’ve done a great job of weaving purpose throughout each concept and their branding is on point.
Like most restaurants, they had some issues with permitting, especially for alcohol within close proximity to an elementary school (totally understandable.) A bunch of other businesses, including the little strip mall that’s in our city within a city had a nice little facelift recently. This also came with some new permits and for this little cafe to now start selling cocktails (yay us!)
I do not know the owner personally, however, I can only assume that once this permit was received they thought, let’s just upgrade this whole thing - I mean, I would! So, they did a quick remodel this past summer and reopened with a new system of how they interacted with their guests and they introduced all-new cocktails…
It was going great…until it wasn’t. DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN….
The fear of change.
I’ll be honest, we didn’t like the updated customer interaction. What used to be a quick brunch, now took a lot longer, but that’s what the business wants. Some people agree with me, some don’t (according to the post on social.) That’s the beauty of small businesses, you support them with your dollars. We figured they had a few kinks that needed to be worked out, so we will go back in a few months. (Also, that’s all lies, we’ve been back. Because our family likes the vibe and the food, we just now know it’s going to take a bit longer to eat.)
But here’s the thing, there’s other restaurants to eat at and there are other ways of interacting with that business without going for brunch.
Here’s where the jump scare comes…
Yup, that is an ACTUAL post from a REAL person on a REAL social media platform, not only posting anonymously but advocating that we all band together and petition for change. As a business, you should make changes that your customers WANT. I do not know what led to their decision to change their brunch, but I’m guessing as business owners they do know exactly why they changed it, and for the record, a bunch of their customers DO like the change.
I thought the fear of change was real, and then I realized that anonymous social media posts might be the jump scare that will actually make you sh*t your pants as a business owner.
It doesn’t matter what business you own, we ALL have a story like this.
For me, the other co-founder of the studio and I were working together at the front desk one day. She got an unexpected and horrible phone call that was a pretty traumatic family emergency. Right after she got off the phone, we were talking about logistics so that she could just go take care of what she needed when a customer walked in. We obviously ignored that customer and the interaction between us and them was bad, because there wasn’t any interaction. The problem was the only few words we spoke to that person was to tell them not to open the doors because a class was going on. They walked out, and right after… I got an immediate alert of a 1-star review on our Yelp page. No other reviews, just that one, and it lived on Yelp for the entirety of the life of the studio. She annihilated us for our customer service, but she didn’t know the full story.
Luckily for the restaurant, the anonymous person (or moderator for the group) ended up taking the post down. It got a lot of pushback (including one post from me, because posting anonymously and bashing a business is just super f*cked up in my opinion, especially if you’re trying to get people who can’t post anonymously to agree with you. There’s A LOT wrong with the post…that’s just like one reason.)
It seems like now more than ever before clients/customers don’t want to be inconvenienced, and at the base of this is the fear of change. Metathesiophobia is the fear of change, and lucky for you it’s rooted in human psychology, so we as entrepreneurs can help our clients understand and process the change a lil’ better…maybe not A LOT but just a little. Research shows that the brain processes uncertainty in the same region where you handle fear… So, if you’re client is like “but, what’s the parking like?” (IYKYK) It’s that anxiety loop of worry and “THIS IS DIFFERENT” and “WHAT AM I GOING TO DOOOOOOOOO.”
In the instance above with the yoga studio and our 1-star review, that customer’s needs were not met and most likely, they were faced with what they feared - worst-case interaction scenario…as in, we were NOT nice.
That’s why when we do make changes, we should expect customers to get mad, be fearful, and all-things-chaos to unfold. Giving them clarity about what is expected and the changes they will face *might* alleviate the situation…or either way, they might just go all Karen Klown and post on social media.
Here’s where this takes a dark turn and we can continue the conversation in another blog, but as business owners in situations like this, we cannot take it personally. We cannot let one pissed-off person dictate our worth and what value we are bringing.
Reality Inventory: Mindfulness Exercise
This is where entrepreneurship is really hard, you’re trying to manage your own stress plus the concerns of the client. In reality, you can’t really do both…
Take a step back and ask yourself, “What is the true value I’m bringing to my community?”
Maybe you’re coaching them into being better versions of themselves, maybe you’re offering families a place to gather and reconnect, and maybe you are offering a space where people can come when they don’t feel like they have any where else to go.
This is when sh*t gets tough, and you need to reconnect with your “Why.” Make note if you’re “why” inventory is low and you need to fill your value inventory back up with some gratitude and good stories.
That Yelp rating haunted me for years, they never came back to the studio, the never took the post down either and there it lived online for everyone to see. But here’s the thing, if asked, I got to tell the real story, and I decided I wasn’t going to let just anyone say something, I did what I do best - fight back with my purpose. I stood my ground on what the studio was about and that customer interaction was an outlier, but honestly, it really wasn’t an outlier in the long run because in that moment, that interaction was about someone INSIDE the studio - the other owner.
I stood my ground on what the studio stood for - being there for people when they needed support. Unfortunately, it did come at the cost of a not ideal customer interaction. But I wouldn’t change it because I know where my intentions were.
I talked to another female founder who is a content creator and she said when she is up against an online hater each person gets one comment only and no fighting but an explanation to help ground herself and the community because it’s important for her to respond and be of value to her community in a grounded and effective way.
Brene Brown says “Don’t try to win over the haters; you are not a jackass whisperer.”
It’s easy to fear or fight every critique, and it’s easy to see it as a personal attack against you and your worth, but it’s NOT ABOUT YOU. It’s about showing up with empathy, understanding, a little grit, and confidence in the value you bring to the table.
You are courageous. You are capable. You are strong. You’re not here to please everyone, so keep saying YES to what works for you and your business.